Friday, April 2, 2010
its been so long i had been moved by anything. i had been thinking alot about what is important about being here on earth. it is weird to think like this.
what the heel i am doing... procastinating....procastinating....
"what am i waiting for?what am i stopping myself? why am i blogging? aren't i busy? why am i feeling so negative all alone? why?" i thought.
i am still reading, this time i started to pick up books that i had been avoiding all along, i had been visiting website that i find it boring or wasting time.
world news: port-au-prince, this earth quake has destroy all the buildings and homes. many lost their jobs, many lost their love one, there are continuous news report that the Haitian went hungry and thirsty. because of food, they search for food provided from the relieve team. many fought, most of them hugged their bags of food and not surrender to the bullies. lots of weak child was stepped when they are trying to get the foods.they fall sick and some gotten stucked under the buildings. some people still digging for lifes,hope for miracle,they choose not to give up so easily. leaders around the world speak up for people in haitian, to help out, to show they care.
depressed, angry,devastated, upset..... just because of this simple reason: no one can meet the contentment for the people in haitian despite the extra effort from countries. what is to do if no one care? what can i do other than flipping newspaper, reading news online?
everyone is able to make a little different, but it will change the world if everyone contribute a little each time.
i will pray for you~~~ Haiti
10:07 AM
what makes you a somebody? the quality that brings in you
how can people judge you through? your character
where you can know who you are? from the people around you
which factor makes you different from others? where you feel comfortable in what you do
why you want to do care about yourself? (everyone has an answer.)
it sounds very logical and common sense. the "something" that i never thought would matter so much in future brings so much importance in life.
this is a school that does alot of personal grooming behind close doors. all the people who graduated from this place mix with idealism people.... it is proven in the past. the people who is born in the 1990's.. hmm generation different.. expectation are different. i saw another types of culture. the few hour stay in JYSS makes me learn so much more than a year of ITE.
i went back to JYSS as turtle promised to bring me back for a visit.. we took some picture and walked around the school.
as usual, the perseverance block is still so creepy as before.... shall skip this part.. anyway!! i saw all my junior also coming back to visit choir.. we had a few hour talk over there..funny thing is that we actually bought chocolate for them and they do not want it! during this trip back school i found out many news related to JYSS. like guo jing went to JYSS to perform.. and the person who invite her is YE LAO... haha amazing move!! you know what i mean!!hahaz!
one of the most surprising news is this person.. he is actually my senior in secondary school! he announce in over the national radio of our school motto!... together we will succeed!! hahaz! he really done us proud!!
other than that i am proud of myself. because my drawing is used as a decoration in the school.. thats the socks i am saying.. 
and this is the carpark that i had sat for almost 5 years of my life!! punishment from teachers,detention for not bringing books!!! all sorts of things!!
the school has change alot and yea..
guess people who watch disney channel last year for HSM hong kong dance competition.. yea.. they are the school who went there to represent singapore..
hahaz whats more that makes me so happy!!! my fav. english teacher, Mr Edwin is now a vice principal of JYSS wow!! happy!!! hahaz! last year i still bump into him when i was going out with my BL chairman and vice-chair
what about my CCA? yes!! all the senior could not take the stress over there.. must be hard on you!! SYF is around the corner and as a almuni of the club.. i shall go to VCH to give support!!! jia you!!!
10:04 AM
1 点17分：
不想睡，我要过完这个时间。 这两天都吃roti prata 和 paper prata >_< 我实在很想吃sempang bedok 和 paper prata。
咳！还是让我上载 6月的照片吧！
蔡依林 赖裕廊坊时我刚好在场。。。 太多人了！太多人推来推去！omg 
6月28日
我和嫂嫂到china square 卖东西。很好玩！可是她迟到。只好下午才到！这个奶茶是我和嫂嫂一起喝的！她的头发剪短了海曼美的！哈哈！
lastly, both of us bought trANSFORMER 3D card and we are super loving it! i am damn jealous of her buying a set of cards for kor kor!
but nvm! i love the bumblebee card i bought. this is the highlight i guess!
okies catch me soon as it is time for me to have another round of makeover! pretty tired working all day long just wanna catch some thrill. before i go to sleep! i love dance!
10:00 AM
no hard feelings on a sport brand but that one is a KILLER FOR TODAY! yes the sales is damn attractive and my dear sports shoes wanna retired after serving me for 4 years straight.SO I BOUGHT A BRAND NEW SPORTS SHOES AND i change to another brand which believe i can dance better than my blue shoes... i thought of wearing it today and soften the base... I AM WRONG AND I GOTTEN BIG FAT FOOT AFTER WEARING IT...
next, my intuition htis when i felt that my boss will drop by and year.. the boss really came in today and i stupidly greet him like my customer... ehh whatever!! just give me my pay!!! haha kidding boss! haha! lucky i painted my face like red buttok as what u want me to do haha!!
next is that.. happy that i manage to sell a wool jackets.. haha a pat on the back.. once again my off days has come... holiday mood again!!
9:58 AM
i just know my plan burst!.... my leg is arching always!!! really envy people who can sit or even lying on the flat floor... me... haha! standing and really seiously,,, fishie have to pay 100 bucks to motivate myself to stand up straight.
my plan burst, i could not go to the place that i promise myself to! does it mean that i got to wait for next year to go???
my plan burst, its my bad, another month i cannot maKE the photo shoot happen...
my plan burst, i cannot perform well after the heavy metal hit-ed onto my foot... really sad that... it is not the same anymore..... i hate to skipped lesson
my plan burst,,, could not attend cosfest....its like.... i had miss many event and i can't even would fight for a day to go for computer fair.
my plan burst.... if this is all the things i gonna break free, how am i going to arrange after that? i really very tired physically and mentally...
pillars are not there. loads are adding on....admit that i could not sleep well recently. when one soul wish that someone is lifting thm. they oat to be there. promises is promises. i promised all that i take care. what they want is the result. only myself will bear the process, that is what make you so clear.
arug!!! whatever!!!
9:57 AM
you know i can stay up late and force myself to sleep late. i know its unhealthy... in my mind. there is a place i always want to go... somewhere i want to do. however i knew in my heart. i cannot do that anymore. i longed to do it in march. however i had failed to did it once again.hiaz... fated that i cannot get that this year... nvm next year.... haha!!! maybe this useless item really kept me thinking for almost few years.... >_< sorry too emotional recently.
anyway.... XUE TING I WANT MY CAKE I WANT MY CAKE...!!!! YOU KNOW I WANT THAT CAKE.... I DON;T CARE, GIVE ME THE CAKE AND NO ONE GET HURT...KAKAKA..... haha joking like always... you also stay happy. and also jump me a surprise soon! and yes... may this consider a update before you tell me this blog is having "butterflies".....lava....WHATEVA"!
to sao sao: sorry again! nv could i be able to make it work! maybe kor really don't want you to spend it!!! hmm!
stress level is getting up due to many matter...matters me.... hope there is something for me to release all the bad aura out.
i want my cake.
i want to dance
i want to eat my maggie mee
i want my holiday
i want my milk tea.
i want my ice cream
i am thankful to have more things added in my room. so happy and yes... new thing come. old thing must go... i have to be materialise. change for the better when is needed. you know, everyone room getting crowded when memories you do not wish to throw...right now turns out to be a garbage in your house... you bet!
after this round of spring cleaning i promised to used everything and until then.... to save myself from debt...
i shall use this 2 month to prove my words!
at the same time.... i hope i can just pass everything to those who need my item more than me. :) salvation army maybe!! anyway i love that place too and LOVE to visit again:) and people. if you are interested what i wanna give out. give me a dial! ^^
i shall stop here now!
9:56 AM
sleepless night is equally bad for health= no sheep on duty to float around= forcing the universe to turn the night to day immediately=bad complexion = could not identify day and night= very hungry= naive thoughts of being vamp
9:54 AM
stop here now!
fish
9:51 AM
wa lao ehhh!! what i day today for me. alot of happening today bad news alot... good news also alot...
how how
how how!!
bad news- i kana have less time for my darling
- i need to postpone all my plan
-i leg kana rolled over by the NTUC trolley
-i gonna admit earning ppls pay isn't so easy!
-i need a recharge and some motivation from people....any kind soul willing to do me this favour?
- the previous post which i mention that i met him and yea.. zai zai he is with another girl again!!but he saw me lookin at him
(haha i doubt he still remembers my name)
- my dear MJ just went to heaven on 25/6/2009(which is 26th in singapore timing) some more i am listening to his men in the mirror song
happily in the bus.. gosh!! i miss your moonwalk! RIP...your godly icon of pop will last eternity...
good news- ber ber finally find new love(misssion accomplished!!)
- i finally able to talk to ber ber... miss x 10000000000
-marble cake is finally out of his mind
-ber ber promise me a spotlight dinner with fish
-ber ber promised to eat his mom's yong tou fu
-i finally can meet up sao sao
-i bought dvd for my dad to watch
-i finally can watch my hk drama... jap darma...korean drama
-heng i came to work early... i gotten my cheesecake while waiting for xue ting to come.
-heng last minute got people buy things or else i gonna buy something on top of the leave thingy
-heng i haven meetup ber ber or sao sao for anything or else i dunno how to handle my financial status
-fish must have a good rest! fighting fish!!
9:50 AM
firstly helicia is in the car. butterfly in my stomach is making me uncomfortable. we as a gang went outing before all went different way. time flies but what is important is every moment spend.
4th june is a day that are suggested by helicia and we started it all from there. i am quite happy that at least people chip in ideas here and there. like renting cars to buying surprise presents. eating foods and going to marina barrage. me and hel sat behind while both guy sat in front
天上的风筝哪去了！。。。
back then, lee wei siong and lee si siong compose this song in marina bay.
haha a random shot anyway
after dinner all went different way. left me and cindy...it is funny that i saw her outside the lift while i talked to ber ber over the phone
but lucky it is a short session. both of us went to watch BLOOD, the last vampire. not really that nice though.. but i do enjoy the ah peh (kato) who ran in a funny way.
anyway thanks for the ride credit to mak and yi hao.
9:50 AM
busy tired! whatever it is! work is fun and many unexpected stuff. laughter all the way and i met many people who wanna find a place in the shop. it really shows how bad the economy is! i have no complain although i am poorly paid in this job. i am going to work on until my 5 year plan is fulfilled completely! fight fish!
i felt so sad when i open my mail after a long day of work.. i recieve a message that makes me hate facebook! why do i get your bad news why! why!..............if i have your answer...............until then.. i shall wait for your replies..............
9:36 AM
today dance is one of the highlight! i came 1 hour early to practice the dance step! ahlamak! cannot make it lor! but much better than last wednesday when i gabra all the dance step like!!*(&$.. well anyway! today learn michael jackson song "BEAT IT" i am so loving the dance step!!! they laughed at me when i am doing on of the dance move! their comment is like so funny:
guy: haha! you very fierce leh!
fish: haha!(turn around and redo the whole song)
the rest of the girl: .....(smile)
jacky: ok fishhie you do the lead all over again! must do 100% perfect huh!
fish:.....
so here is the whole thing.. dunno why but very looking forward for the next few weeks!
P.S:i am gonna be MJ possesed this few days! lolx!
9:36 AM
不像睡，不想说，也不想玩。
封闭自己是应该还是一种逃避？
夜生人静 的夜晚 让胆小的心灵放下种种负担。
回忆；让人欢喜让人愁。
过去的事，让他过去，无论好的坏的，已经过去了，也不必把事情看得太重。
好的，就像一想；笑一笑。不好的，也就笑一笑；安慰自己，鼓励自己。
不想睡，不想闭上眼睛， 也不想再梦见你。
现在变得不像我自己
天黑了，谁陪我到天亮？
你；是否听到我的呐喊？
多么要你关心，多么希望是一种舍
不想睡，不想听，再也不想知道你的事情
为了逃避，掩饰我自己。
夜太黑，我似呼迷失影子
这焕然的领悟，才知道你在我心里的地位
挽不回，放不下，舍不得。
决定走下去，不是因为痛
决定放手，不是因为勇敢
决定后的事，不是因为你
9:34 AM
